Thoughts of a Saturday Morning

I always need to write loads of stuff, but I end up writing only 20% of them. My thoughts are always messy and never truly organized, one moment am thinking about how beautiful my coffee is and the next am wondering about every one who is sitting alone here in the Starbucks Tivoli branch. I wonder if they are here waiting for someone, or maybe just needed time alone? If so, why do they need a time alone? Are they like me searching for truth that they don’t know about? Or searching for solution for problems that long to be solved? Or maybe they are here to get some solitude to finish some important business or projects or assignments at college or worthless masters – as far as I think till now- like me?

Why do I concentrate on the lives of people that much yet I never interfere? I always watch silently and wonder in my little mind about the details of how their day may be going, I think about how similar we all are, how our lives actually may cross each other without even noticing. Here I am, sitting next to the window because outside there is just no empty chair at all. Here I am, supposed to continue writing my thesis but instead I opened a new word document window to write this because I forgot my ever lovely Harry Potter notebook. Thinking about all of this. Thinking about missing my old friend Deena, thinking about having a day off work tomorrow just to have some rest. What rest? Why do I need to rest? I barely do anything taking energy, am suppose to be doing the normal, what should be normally and naturally done for any girl in my age, But, somehow I find myself in solitude these days, just solitude and small little self accomplishments.

When I watch a movie, am always interested in the story whatever it is and however it goes, if the story touches my soul. I have watched two movies that touched me really deep. The first one was Hidden Figures, maybe because I am an engineer and GOD how am I proud of being an Engineer. I love my field so much and I love mathematics and physics, I actually wish if we had jobs like those in the movies for mathematical processes and science applications. But, unfortunately computers took all over the place. Time to learn programming maybe? Programming is actually similar to mathematics after all isn’t it? It is based on languages, numbers, bunch of zeroes and ones really, and algorithms. Programming is fun as well, but equations with unknowns are much even funnier. Look at me, a girl who finds equations fun. Well, I know that a movie is good when it drives me to search online for more information about it. Hidden Figures was one of the movies that did that, I searched for the real characters Katherine Goble, Mary and Dorothy Vaughan. They are legends!  I wish one day, if I could ever, reach a position for NASA. They are role models. The movie made me even search for online equations to be solved in different fields of mathematics. I mean, seriously, I spent the night solving equations as if am back to college once again, this is how much I loved it!

The second movie though, was called Paterson. That movie touched me in a way that is very weird. I mean “Spoilers alert”, the fact that everyday of his life is actually similar except for a very few events in every day, which is actually how our lives all go after graduation and finding a job. People really almost live the same events everyday after all. How does that affect our mentality and creativity everyday? In his way, he poetically described everything he saw everything that was new to him in poems. Words that did not necessarily rhyme but beautifully described how he felt and what he saw. He noticed every day conversations between random people on the bus, they affected his thoughts and how he saw things in his own perspective. He reminded me of myself when I notice what people say or follow their side talks out of stupid curiosity. 

God I wish I can write my masters as fast as I wrote this page. Where was I? Yeah, am in Starbucks trying to write a single paragraph in the thesis but I got distracted as always.